One of the most extreme things a human can do is to kill another. Take the level of craziness some notches higher and you have enough for suicide. I believe that in 99% of suicide cases the emotional upheaval veils a better solution. (Killing animals is extreme to me too, but it is an inseparable part of civilization by now.)
YET I've realized there's one powerful aspect of suicide—the suicide note. Yeah, right? Here's how:
Today somehow I started thinking of how I would write my suicide note if I ever had to. I made a mental list of the reasons that trouble me enough. And as I thought about each one I realized that most of these, partly or wholly, directly or indirectly, are self-created troubles. The remaining few might not be my fault, but then were they really significant? Not on the scale of a human life.
Thus the idea of suicide (so to speak) dissolved and I flexed my be-grateful-for-everything muscles.
The catch here is that I'm NOT even close to suicidal to begin with. Hardly a surprise then, that the reasons that were anyway not strong enough to drive me to suicide, didn't succeed (or should I say fail?). But what's relevant is not that I survived this activity, but that I felt better after it. By listing out my problems I realized that they are neither HUGE nor irreparable. The result: I felt more in control of my life and (more) grateful for all the good stuff—once you start counting it's a whole lot.
This time all of this happened and I just went with the flow; next time I'll drive the flow of thoughts: (Try this out.)
1. Grab a pen/cil and paper.
2. List out all the problems and reasons for unhappiness in your life.
3. Categorize them according to which ones you are responsible for, which ones don't have a solution (are you sure?), which ones don't deserve the attention, etc.
4. Write down what you can do about each one—try getting rid of it, work your way around it, stop bothering about it—whatever gives you power over the problem.
5. Read the whole list and start executing around the ideas you generated. Gratitude muscles twitching a little? Flex them and count your blessings.
Oh, and whenever you write* your Suicide Note 2.0 please give it a more positive name and let me know about it, and the whole experience.
*Make sure you write it out—2.0 is all about the written form. Your brain will also react better.
The Pleasure of Discipline
Every time I enter my room, a sign on the door stares me in the face and shouts out loud: "The price of discipline is always less than the pain of regret." The price of discipline, or rather the reluctance to pay it, is the reason why so many of us do not reach the heights of our potential. Discipline is often the difference between being successful and being regretful.
However, I think a more relevant concept is that of the pleasure of discipline. If that sounds foreign to you, you're not alone. The first time I developed this idea, it took some time to put pleasure and discipline together.
Before getting up this morning I'd been lounging around in bed for some minutes. Then I said to myself, "You have two choices--continue with the bad routine, or get the discipline juices flowing. Put mind over mattress." That was enough to propel me out of bed. I almost sleep-walked to my washroom, and happened to look into the mirror. What I saw was a sleepy face, with a slight hint of reluctance and irritation. I hardly paid any attention and took a shower--something that would ordinarily happen hours later. I cursed myself as the cool water made me shiver. That lasted a couple seconds, and after stepping out, I saw myself in the same mirror again. Spontaneously and impulsively I gave one of my biggest, brightest smiles. It was big and bright and most importantly a genuinely happy smile. I was so happy with myself, feeling utter delight at having snapped out of a bad habit (or at least having started the journey). And the happiness was anything but short-lived.
After getting ready, I went to the Gurdwara, took a walk around the block, and came back home, feeling great. The next few hours were enthusiastically productive--there was some revision to do before I wrote an important exam later in the morning--and I enjoyed the studying way more than ever. Not only that, the exam was great, and now, hours later, I'm still excited and happy (and it's rubbing off on the ones around me), not tired at all, and smiling days worth of smiles sitting here.
AND it doesn't get close to ending here either! Tomorrow morning when I think about how great today was, I'll have another reason to shoot out of bed and give myself the same experience all over again. Again, it doesn't end there. The chain reaction this day will hopefully initiate, will keep getting bigger and better and bring more happiness and contentment into my life!
The moral of the story: Once you overcome the initial resistance of trying out something new, or developing a new habit, or shedding an old one, you can't help thanking yourself for it. The circumstances we've always lived in have a way of trying to pull us back when we try to escape. It's painful to resist, but once you pay the price of discipline and overcome the force of gravity, the investment pays off and the profit is all yours--The Pleasure of Discipline.
* "Put mind over mattress." and "The price of discipline is always less than the pain of regret." are ideas from Robin Sharma. *
However, I think a more relevant concept is that of the pleasure of discipline. If that sounds foreign to you, you're not alone. The first time I developed this idea, it took some time to put pleasure and discipline together.
Before getting up this morning I'd been lounging around in bed for some minutes. Then I said to myself, "You have two choices--continue with the bad routine, or get the discipline juices flowing. Put mind over mattress." That was enough to propel me out of bed. I almost sleep-walked to my washroom, and happened to look into the mirror. What I saw was a sleepy face, with a slight hint of reluctance and irritation. I hardly paid any attention and took a shower--something that would ordinarily happen hours later. I cursed myself as the cool water made me shiver. That lasted a couple seconds, and after stepping out, I saw myself in the same mirror again. Spontaneously and impulsively I gave one of my biggest, brightest smiles. It was big and bright and most importantly a genuinely happy smile. I was so happy with myself, feeling utter delight at having snapped out of a bad habit (or at least having started the journey). And the happiness was anything but short-lived.
After getting ready, I went to the Gurdwara, took a walk around the block, and came back home, feeling great. The next few hours were enthusiastically productive--there was some revision to do before I wrote an important exam later in the morning--and I enjoyed the studying way more than ever. Not only that, the exam was great, and now, hours later, I'm still excited and happy (and it's rubbing off on the ones around me), not tired at all, and smiling days worth of smiles sitting here.
AND it doesn't get close to ending here either! Tomorrow morning when I think about how great today was, I'll have another reason to shoot out of bed and give myself the same experience all over again. Again, it doesn't end there. The chain reaction this day will hopefully initiate, will keep getting bigger and better and bring more happiness and contentment into my life!
The moral of the story: Once you overcome the initial resistance of trying out something new, or developing a new habit, or shedding an old one, you can't help thanking yourself for it. The circumstances we've always lived in have a way of trying to pull us back when we try to escape. It's painful to resist, but once you pay the price of discipline and overcome the force of gravity, the investment pays off and the profit is all yours--The Pleasure of Discipline.
* "Put mind over mattress." and "The price of discipline is always less than the pain of regret." are ideas from Robin Sharma. *
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